How do I take care of myself as a mom?

my unexpected diagnosis after a routine check-up and what it has taught me about my son's birth

Pain is not foreign to me. I’m no stranger to unexpected diagnoses after dealing with chronic illness since I was 14 and surviving a high-risk pregnancy that felt like a full-time job to manage.

As a new mom, I had a decision to make: would I ignore myself in favor of caring for my newborn? Or would I continue to care for my body?

This seems like a no-brainer. Choice B, duh! Take care of yourself, Mama.

But when exhaustion hits you like the plague it’s easy to choose ignoring yourself, to focus on massaging out clogged ducts and learning to nap on command.

Instead, I scheduled my annual wellness exams with the A-Z doctors. I found childcare. I showed up in my sleep-deprived state.

And something unexpected popped up.

***

For the first time online, I’m opening up about my health journey that has unfolded offline over the last year.

A huge thank you to

Coffee + Crumbs

for publishing my essay, “Fading Scars” as part of the Winter Collection. You can read the full essay here. If this essay connects with you, please leave a comment and share it with others—that is always a gift to writers.

It is such an honor to join the company of talented and thoughtful writers on

Ashlee Gadd

’s team and other guest writers.

Sonya Spillmann

collaborated with me on the editorial process and made this essay shine.

coffeeandcrumbs

A post shared by @coffeeandcrumbs

“That’s the thing about memories and scars: they change over time.

The fresh and the faded tell different stories.”

-

Ashley Fenker

, “Fading Scars” published by

COFFEE + CRUMBS

P.S.

It feels fitting that I’m writing this in between changing poopy diapers, wiping a snotty nose, and snuggling out those cries. (Also to the tune of Paw Patrol, IYKYK.) The life of a working mom, right? I know you’re juggling a lot too, so thank you for being here and reading this.

If you’re new here, will you consider subscribing and sharing Stuff Moms Google? Sharing my writing can feel weird and scary (as I know other writers feel, too). A simple share can go a long way. Connect with me here on Instagram.